![]() ![]() ![]() Or at the very least, being asked to give up one of my major organs. When he then asked me, “Do you have time to talk?” in a completely sober tone, I was pretty much expecting the apocalypse. He never called me by my name unless it had a curse word before it. So when Eli, who usually only called me twice a month and was drunk as a skunk each and every single time, called and started our conversation with “ Gaby-Gaby ” in a sing-song voice, I knew something was up. ![]() The seven pounds and face full of acne I gained from stuffing my face with Spicy Cheetos and glazed donuts didn’t help matters either. She then told everyone else in my family that I had cried my eyes out for a week after my breakup and followed that up by watching My Girl every night for a month straight. Who was I kidding? Everyone knew I was pathetic when my best friend, Laila, told my parents I’d been dumped. Although the whole being “pathetic” part was only known by me… and my best friend… and my parents… and my brothers… and my sister… and my nieces. T he last conversation that changed my life started with the words, “Gaby, we need to talk.”Įxactly four minutes and fifty-five seconds later, I was apparently A) not in a relationship anymore, B) homeless and C) pathetic. ![]()
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